she wont

shes going to live, if only a few weeks longer, she is going to live.

no pain worth living through

really i hope i die when Dolly does. i can't live without her, it would be to hard. its hard just to live with her here, but without her, my world is gone, love falls away, hate comes into light, filling every corner and crack in every wall, in every room. she can't die, i've been in that darkness before, i can't go there again, please, somebody with the power to help me, help me. our hearts cannot be seperated, my heart is not strong enough to beat on its own.

new blog

i decided to make this new one, just out of shear bordem, i might be angry when i post here, i think i'm going to make this my new, 'get my feelings out' blog whoever reads this, beware, some of the things i say get intense, especially in times like these. some might disagree with my version of intense, and think its not. but i refuse to hold back on this blog. if you want life, go to the other one, i wont post feelings there anymore, only facts and about my life. this is my hell, this is my heaven, this is everywhere inbetween, most importanly, this is all me.